Loss
I recently suffered a loss. It stung, it hurt, it was unexpected. It came on quickly and then was over just as fast. This blogs’ purpose today is not to delve into the processing of loss but to talk about a new way to look at it.
Loss of any kind is usually to be avoided at all costs in our lives (unless its weight loss usually… come on, chuckle with me on that one). Our brains and our hearts want to avoid pain as much as possible. We don’t like discomfort and we certainly do not like feeling a hole in our life. But in my quiet this morning, I heard the whisper “Loss is normal. Loss is part of life. Loss must happen.” Excuse me, what?
However, this is so true. Loss has to happen. You cannot receive everything in every area and be able to hold it all. You cannot have every relationship for all your life. You cannot keep every job, every friend, every penny your whole life. There is an ebb and flow, a catching and a releasing. To lose is to mean you once had. To never lose is to mean you never had. Are you following me? To never lose a friend, means you never had one. To never lose love, means you never had it. It’s a part of the process of life, of the cycle and rhythm of things here on earth.
While feeling the emptiness of loss is not something we ever long for, I think the meaning we give it is what makes it excruciating. What if we can begin to see other sides? Thankfulness for the time we did have, for the blessing we did have, for the love and joy we did experience. Know that it can come again. What if we can begin to trust ourselves and God that good will come again. Maybe even something better? In America, we are taught to avoid pain at all costs. I believe that’s part of what is killing us in America - why addictions run rampant. When we can look at painful emotions and embrace them and feel them, they lose their hold on us. They lose their ability to strike fear in us.
So, while I was saddened at the sudden death of this once thriving thing in my life, I am also filled with joy, yes, joy and thankfulness. I experienced love. I experienced relationship. I gave love hard. I learned and grew. I wouldn’t change it for the world. I know Gods got me and, I’VE got me. I’ve got my own back and gain will come again! Because that my dear friend is part of the process of life too.
