Failure
I want to delve into a not so fun topic that can turn into a fun one once you change your thoughts about it! You must change this thought process and your language if you’re ever going to be successful in ANY area of life.
When a child is learning to walk, they fall thousands of times, don’t they? Do we scold them when they fall? NO! We cheer them on, tell them how proud we are of them. We hug them and screech with joy. The child doesn’t lay down and get depressed and say, “I give up, I’m such a failure, I can’t do this!!” NO! They delight in your praise, and they get back up and they keep trying!
Yet, when we’re trying something new, we do the complete opposite. We get things wrong, or they don’t work, we immediately get down on ourselves. We beat ourselves up. Often, we scold ourselves and worst of all, we quit. We assign failure to ourselves. Why?? It’s not failure, it’s learning! In Life Coach school I was taught that there is no failing, just learning. The only failure is when you quit or give up. Failure is when you believe the lie that you can’t do it, you can’t figure it out, there is no way for you, and you quit. Other than that, you are learning. You cannot expect yourself to do something new or to achieve a new goal and do it all perfectly the first time… or the tenth… or even the 100th time! Each time something doesn’t work, you’ve learned. You’ve learned something new. So, tweak it a little and try again. Try the same thing again just to make sure it wasn’t a fluke. It doesn’t matter how or what you try, just keep going.
Try it on for size this week. When something doesn’t work out or go according to plan, from the smallest thing such as being late for an appointment, to the biggest as a failed business launch, say “well that didn’t work. OK that’s one more way I know doesn’t work. I can cross that one off the list.” And then try the next formulation. Be kind to yourself, hug yourself and praise yourself and most of all, BE PROUD! You are not a failure, you are not failing, you are learning my dear one!
